My first tough letter - Q. I was tempted to include the band Qeensryche on the sole basis on their terrible power ballad "Silent Lucidity." It played almost non-stop in the early 90's. However, given the fact they've had only that single hit yet have still found a way to release eleven lps, sell more than 20 million albums worldwide, and still tour to this day I'll give them a pass. Here are the losers...
P- PADDLE BOATS. At no other time in your life will you work so hard to produce so little. Tricia and I once paid to paddle boat in Forest Park in St. Louis. We made it about a half-mile away from the dock when a sudden thunderstorm moved in. We started to pedal like mad only to see a few glaciers pass us by. It was ridiculous. When you consider they charge you by the half-hour it's actually pretty genius.
Others: painting (or at least cleaning up afterward), paisley shirts, parades, parasites, political ads, photographs of me, pickles, pigeons, pipes (except maybe the corncob type), poison ivy, pollution, Pomeranian's, potpourri, prunes, pumice stones, and power ballads.
Q- QUENTIN TARANTINO. Go ahead. You Tube him and try to listen to him talk for more than five minutes. At best it will produce an epileptic seizure.
Others: quiche, questions in the final minutes of a meeting or class, queen bees, quicksand
R- RECEDING HAIR. A few of my students keep telling me that I'm going bald. I thought they meant I had a microscopic bare spot on the crown of my noggin but when asked to show me they proceeded to point out my growing forehead. This reminds me I should have included the "comb-over" back at the letter C.
Others: raccoons, rashes, Ronald McDonald, razor burn, rodeos, rust, R. Kelly, rude people
Again, I am with you on most of these. Don't know Queensryche - although I'd probably recognize the song. I wondered what you'd write for that obscure Q.
ReplyDeletePaddleboats?! Who would have thought? Consider puke and punks. I totally agree about Quentin Tarantino. An obvious case of the Emperor's New Clothes with that guy. He's just naked and foolish to me. Gotta say I like raccoons.
I do not believe that you are going bald (yet) but I do think that your forehead may be growing bigger. You've got to put those big old brains some place.
I can't wait to see what you write for my old friend X. We got our dictionaries from the Rotary Club today. I think there were only 5 or 6 X's.
I wonder if there is anyone who likes paddleboats. I mean, other than this one family that lived in my cul-de-sac when I was a kid. They LOVED their paddle boat. They LOVED their paddleboat so much that they built it a trailer. We lived in a neighborhood that had lake access, but there was a massive (-ly excellent for bike riding) hill between our houses and the lake. Their dad chopped up a bike in such a way that the front part still had the pedals in working order with the front wheel, attached that part to a big pallet of wood in the back, and added wheels to the pallet. That way, the kid du jour could ride the paddleboat down to the lake for some really irritating use. It was always an event for the kids in the hood to get to hobble that boat down to the dock. Good times. Thanks for the memory jogging.
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