A week or two ago I was asked to introduce myself to a group of teachers in an "alternate" way. This was to mean I could not talk about my classroom, my school, or my degree program. I'm really not good at introductions - of any sort. I generally say very little which produces, at the end, an awkward silence in which everyone wonders if I am finished. Not knowing how to let people know I'm finished talking is one of the many social cues I have yet to learn. Am I supposed to make the pitch of my voice go up, or maybe down? Am I supposed to finish with a flurry of rapid talking followed by jazz hands? I suppose I should consider creating a catchy sign off to help people know that I have no more to say. Maybe something along the lines of "That's it. If you want to know anymore you'll have to read the transcripts from the arraignment". Somehow, though, I suspect this would only lead to more awkwardness.
So I was challenged to go outside of the obvious this time around and offer up an introduction of myself that helped people know more about me than just my role as a teacher and a learner. What to do???
"My name is Chris and I'd like to introduce myself by telling you all the things I hate...from A-Z."
Ha, this list may be childish but it paid off beautifully within the context of an introduction. Not only do I think there might actually be some value in using the things we "hate" to learn more about ourselves and others but the mere fact that someone would create such a list is telling as well. Of what I'm not certain. But definitely telling.
So to further my journey into my deepest thoughts and feelings I present the letters S, T, and U.
S- Seesaws. Do you remember the first time you climbed onto a seesaw? You had probably seen them on television and thought they'd be SO MUCH FUN. Then you climbed on only to find out that, sadly, it's just a trick to get you to do a bunch of deep crunches or else feel the jarring discomfort of having your ass repeatedly dropped into the ground. The only saving grace was to take comfort in the fact that the incessant squeaking of the "seeeeeee.....saaaaaaaw.....seeeeeee.....saaaaaaw" drove your parents nuts.
Others: sailor uniforms, saluting, scones, Scottish terriers, secrets, shaving, shopping, sickness, silverfish, slippers, smugness, snoring, splinters, suits, syringes
T- Tickling (but only as the recipient).Why do kids love being tickled so much? It's terrible. I HATE being tickled. When our kids try to tickle I do my best not to let on that it's bothering me in hopes that they'll soon give up and come to the conclusion that I'm not ticklish. Seriously, it gives me the creeps. Yet Ty will let you tickle him until he can hardly breath and then ask you to do it again. I don't get it.
Others: tanks, tanning beds, tartness, termites, thorns, tiaras, ties, tobacco, tobacco companies, toupees, tuxedos
U- Ultra-sound photos. Are these truly necessary? I'm convinced they're a scam perpetrated on poor unsuspecting insurance companies. Only a parent, or perhaps grandparent, could get so excited about a smalll white fuzzy blob that looks like nothing at all. How many poor children have had to endure years of being called Peanut as a result of these "photographs"?
Others: uniforms, urinal cakes
HA! Urinal cakes.
ReplyDeleteYou know, the more I think about it, the more introducing yourself with the things you hate sounds like an awesome idea. I may try getting my new little ones next year to introduce themselves this way - after first giving them some time to reflect on it. Think of the phonics you could teach! ...klowns, jerms, jragons, etc.
My first experiences with see saws (teeter-totters in my neck of the woods) were surrounded with the teasing of two older brothers who wouldn't let me down after about a half a minute of this fairly boring pastime. Of course I dished it out to my younger brother when it was his time. Consider sweater-vests and swastikas. (That's an odd juxtaposition of words.)
I'm with you on the tickling thing. I can dish it out, but I can't take it. Did you ever notice that you can't really tickle yourself? It's all about the context. Consider terrorism and ticks.
Have you ever seen a 3-D ultra sound? (Actually I think they call them 4-D which involves time travel or something.) They are pretty awesome, if a little voyeuristic. Consider ultraconservatives and unicorns.
Still waiting on your x list. In the dictionaries the Rotarians gave us there are only about 5 x words. None seem hate-worthy.
That intro thing was stressful for me too. Jazz hands would be interesting to try as a social cue, though. Let me know how that works for you. I'm with Tim, things we hate are very informative about us. If for no other reason than what we hate shows what we notice. I think it is easier for me to pick out the things I don't like than specify one thing for each letter that I really really like. I had a serious dislike of being tickled as a kid. That whole practice didn't make much sense to me at all. Also, on the topic of ultrasound photos...(please note this comes from someone with no children of her own) they creep me out and I tend to see an alien when I look at them, every time, every kid.
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